Married Scapegoats

Avoid these Communication Mistakes.... ......... ........

Paul Arden, former executive creative director, Saatchi & Saatchi, has a
mantra, 'It's not how good you are, it's how good you want to be.'
Arden has clearly stated what ought to be any professional' s mantra.
We all have talents and strengths. We also have areas of weaknesses, and
one such area is poor inter-personal communication skills. This can be
detrimental to your career since these skills are important in any area
of life, but more so in the professional arena. They go a long way in
boosting job satisfaction, growth, promotion, network building,
relationship management, etc. It is, therefore, important to hone these
skills.

Here are some common communication problems and suggestions on how you
can tackle them.

Talking too fast: Problem: If people normally look a little lost or
confused when conversing with you, it would be a good idea to evaluate
the speed at which you speak. Saumil Doshi, 26, a consulting financial
analyst, speaks so fast that most of his clients lose out on
approximately 70 per cent of his conversation. Unfortunately, not many
people are able to trust fast talkers, especially fast talking financial
analysts.

Solution: Saumil recorded his speech on a dictaphone and listened to
himself in an effort to improve the way he spoke. He also used tongue
twisters to help clarify as well as slow down his speech. These
included:

~ The three things that those three thought are thoroughly trashy.

~ She sells seashells on the seashore.

~ We wash white vests very well and vouch for well-washed vests.

Talking too much:

Problem: Manish Parikh, 32, a store manager at Avanee Boutique, Mumbai,
is well read. He loves sharing his knowledge with everyone, including
his customers. Initially, they were impressed but, as time went by,
they got bored. Slowly, customers started avoiding him. His boss, the
storeowner, asked him to focus on running the store and not chatting up
customers to show off his knowledge.

Solution: Remember, nobody wants irrelevant information. At work, ask
yourself if what you are going to say will make sense or add any value
to what is being discussed. Then, and only then, go ahead and say it.
This one requires practice and discipline, as we all want to share our
knowledge and, of course, show off a bit at times.

Talking to boss/ client:

Problem: You are standing in front of your chairman at your company's
annual bash. When you are introduced to him, all you do is blurt out a
"How are you?" You have lost your chance to interact with him, and he
has moved ahead to greet other people. Do you tongue-tied when it comes
to speaking with/ before your seniors/ important clients? Solution:
Use a three-pronged approach to tackle this particular block:

~ If the situation permits, decide what you want to say in advance and
practise it a couple of times in front of the mirror. There are times
this may not be possible; you could then mentally imagine scenarios
where you are communicating successfully with your seniors.

~ Before going for the meeting, ensure all the supporting documents and
necessary stationery are with you.

~ Cultivate your confidence by knowing your self-worth (please don't go
to the other end of the spectrum and develop an ego). Build a rapport
with those people who share time or space with you. Get rid of your
shyness step-by-step and, before you know it, a throat block is history.

Negative body language:

Problem: Fidgeting, shuffling from one foot to the other, cracking your
knuckles, fiddling with accessories, scratching your head -- all these
take away from the impact of what you are saying.

Mamta Parikh, 28, PA to the technical director of KC and Sons (a
marketing company), had the habit of snapping her hairclip open and
closed. She never realised how distracting it was during meetings. One
day, her boss pointed this out and she made a conscious habit to stop.

Solution: Be aware of your body movements and language. The minute you
start fidgeting, make yourself stop. Curb irritating habits like tapping
feet, rocking squeaky chairs, humming, whistling and jostling. Again,
getting rid of these habits will take you time.

Mind your manners: Problem: Param L*, 22, a part-time sales person
with a leading bookstore, disliked the way his colleague would interrupt
him when he was helping a customer. Param finally spoke to his colleague
about his habit. Lucky for him, the latter changed his style of working.

Solution: It pays to be polite and aware of your bad habits. 'Please'
and 'Thank you' go a long way in building good relationships. Little
things like asking for permission before borrowing stationery and
helping a newly recruited colleague, etc, go a long way in cultivating
relationships.

So, what's stopping you from scaling that ladder? Go ahead, climb up to
dizzy heights and reach your own cloud nine.
We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge. People make
mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while
in a rage will haunt us forever. Pause and ponder. Think before you
act. Be patient. Forgive & forget. Love one and all. If you
judge people, you have no time to love them". -- Mother Teresa
Never take some one for granted,Hold every person Close to your Heart
because you might wake up one day and realise that you have lost a
diamond while you were too busy collecting stones." Remember this
always in life.